“This course is about facing your self. Looking at your behaviour patterns, good and bad, face on. It is about understanding them, where they came from and how they were formed from the experience of being sent to BS at such an early age and for so many years of your formative life. An institutionalised love dessert! It educates you about why you have these patterns and with this awareness you are more likely to be able to make positive decisions and changes that will benefit your life. It was not easy to feel the difficult and sometime shameful and toxic feelings that I had so skillfully avoided for so many years. Just knowing that I was in the BS 'soup' with others in the group made it easier to release difficult feelings when needed because I knew I would be heard and seen ”

“Doing such an in depth course is the only way to truly appreciate the impact of boarding school on your life. Even for people who, like me until 2 years ago, said boarding school hadn't affected them, I would recommend it as a way of getting to know yourself and understand your life and the difficulties you have had. I have found the course very useful. It has encouraged me to ask so many questions about who I am today. I have come away with a better understanding and acceptance of my past. The online community has been very supportive and helpful. I would recommend the course to anyone who has been away to school. Amelia has been a great mentor and support throughout this journey ”

“I embarked on The Boarding School Course because I discovered late in life (I am 72) that going to boarding school was the source event causing my depression and dysfunctional behaviour. I had read widely around the subject but still couldn't see a way to get better. I came across the course by chance when seeking individual therapy for the problem. The course has given me an in depth understanding of the effects of boarding school on children and it contains fascinating modules with facts and introductions to a wide range of psychological theory together with practical tips. Being spread over 6 months with 2 weeks between each module release and each group get-together is perfectly pitched as it enables you to really absorb the modules and work through the handbooks without feeling pressurised or stretched. And it is such an amazing help to discover that all boarding school survivors share similar experiences and subsequent life problems. Meeting a group of people with the same problems is empowering. And Amelia White is an amazing facilitator who brings extensive knowledge of theory and practice and shares her own experiences in a uniquely empathic way. ”

“This course was life-changing for me. Well-constructed, sensitively delivered, really helpful content which guides you gently through some deep and heart-searching issues suffered by Boarding School Survivors. It helps by moving members toward a ways of healing and bringing positive change ”

“it brought home the academic understanding I had developed through reading about BSS - it allowed me to feel it, which made a world of difference. The sharing of experiences and vulnerabilities with other participants created an emotional response in me, and I believe that this was the most transformative part of the experience. It far exceeded what I have ever experienced with 1:1 talk therapy.”

“I benefitted more than I could have imagined possible from the process of being heard by, and witnessing the expressions of other ex-borders that have recognized that their early experiences were negatively consequential and who are ready to explore how they might move on.”

“Do it! You won't regret it and you'll be doing yourself a huge favour. It can transform your whole life! ”

“The modules were really comprehensive and fascinating. An amazingly clever mix of theory and practical tips. The handbooks were interesting to work through.”

“The modules dealing with adolescence and relationships with parents were helpful. The one on intimacy was hard. There wasn't a weak module. I enjoyed the group sessions as an informal way to discuss the subject.”

“I found the content very useful and interesting. It's asked some really good questions and made me aware of so many things that have shaped me into the person I am now. I have more awareness of the different parts of me. I think before the course I was unable to dial into these parts as I didn't understand where these feelings were coming from.”

“The bi-weekly call was very important to me. It was the glue that kept me going during the difficult times. Knowing that we were in it together I found strength to continue through the pain and keep showing up and keep doing the module work”

“All of it, but especially the modules about being a third culture kid, the inner child and really being able to show it compassion at ALL times especially in times of abandonment and fear. I remember having a breakthrough moment with this module. It was all about getting to know this part of me which I had had been externalising instead of getting to love and accept it. Can't thank you enough for this Amelia. A real game changer!”

“The early parts of the content, the introduction to IFS, the interaction between members and the sharing of stories and experiences and the process from awareness, through to integration that helped me to shift from a stuck place

I have become so much more compassionate and accepting to all the 'parts' of myself, especially my abandoned and fearful inner child. Transformational. I can now be kinder and I have noticed that I pause more if I am getting stressed. I talk to my inner child more rather than push it away. Wow! Amazing change there. It feels like I have more space in my heart. I have also slowed down my breathing more which is making me more grounded. If I am doing something that does not resonate with me, I stop and talk to my inner child and ask her if she is ok and I am getting more clear answers from her nowadays. ”

“The course was outstanding! There were so many aspects to each module that were unexpected; light bulb moments for sure. Sometimes I would see the title of the Module and think, " This does not seem to be related to me" only to find out that it was very much related to me. I really liked that Amelia was on the video, talking through the content; I felt connected to her and felt that she cared about us enough to take the time to make the recording. I liked the visual aspects of the module video, the slides, and her own personal experiences that she added during the recording. It was very thorough and presented with kindness and compassion but also with an underlying belief that it was possible to heal and move on with greater understanding and awareness of who we are and can be.”

“Overall it has been full of impactful revelations and I am so pleased that I now understand why I am what I am and can understand my behaviour through the years much better. That has really helped to lift the shame that has dogged my life. I now understand my wound and my feeling of existential emptiness.

Telling friends and family that I am doing the course has helped me to show my vulnerable side without feeling ashamed. My partner has listened to each module and read my handbook and it has helped her to know me better but also has helped her as she was an abused child. It was difficult at times for my partner because it forced her to confront her past too. But we have become closer. I have also improved my relationship with my brother. ”

“My goal was to reconcile with my adult children who unfortunately had to go through BS as well. During the course they were open to me sharing what I was learning and feeling; this enabled us to begin rebuilding our relationships. It will take more from here but the most difficult barrier has been addressed; to just start talking honestly and sharing experiences. I managed to open up during the module on Shame. It was so freeing for me to realize I was being silenced by shame. Once I got that, I was able to have understanding and compassion for the small child within me and the experiences that she had endured.

I am more relaxed and open with my husband which is great. I also had a more honest and open conversation with my mother on the phone which felt more authentic and that was also really good. One of my closest friends said I was more self assured, more in my body and clearer. ”

How beneficial were the groups? 

"Group sessions were very useful. I have learnt so much from the others. Listening to others has increased my awareness within myself and made me ask more questions about myself. The live discussion groups were very important to me. We got to hear of so many different life experiences and that in itself was valuable. The break out groups were fun as we got to know each other a bit more.

I found them so helpful because even though we did not get a lot of time to talk individually there was always relevant chat going on and a lot of time everyone answered questions which were popping up in my head but didn't have time to ask or talk about. It was also so interesting to hear other people's life ”

“I'm able to have a better understanding of that 11 year old girl and what she grew in to and feel very sad for her grief. Whether I am actually feeling the depth of that grief yet I don't know. I feel sad and angry on behalf of the 72 year old adult too who still has such a low opinion of herself and is tortured about her weight. I feel sad for my mother who knew she had made an error but the consequences were irretrievable.

It made me look into the past and how it has shaped me. I have always thought that I was so lucky and privileged to be sent to a boarding school. I still believe that boarding schools have lots to offer in terms of extra curricular but the trade off for people like me is quite damaging. I have come to realise that having had my attachment with my parents broken at such a young age has been very damaging. ”

“The course showed me that my BS experience had an impact. I did not even realize that! I knew it was odd and I had missed my home life and family, but I was still stuck in the "privilege" of it. This course totally opened everything up for me, ESPECIALLY meeting other people who had had the exact same experiences! I could no longer ignore facts and say I got through it okay!!

Understanding WHY I have certain patterns of behaviour such as over working, isolating myself from my husband, mother, father, sister and friends, trust issues with people, disrespect for authority (esp. police) no sense of belonging anywhere, no strong boundaries, my fear of flying and abandonment, not looking after myself properly, craving for sweet foods, my rage at my father, mother and sister etc. all makes so much more sense now!

This is a MUST for anyone who attended Boarding School

Amelia is with us all the way; We are there for each other in the group calls and in the community group. The course material is really well put together and easy to read, follow and understand. I liked that it was concise, visually appealing and had the recording of you going through it. I am looking forward to being in the group that Amelia has set up for us to all stay in touch. I am sure this is going to be important as I did feel abandoned, yet again, when BS ended. Out in the world without a guide! ”